God Working in my Life

I have been pondering on how God seems to be working pretty hard in my life at the moment. I first thought about it at my last DDO meeting, when I could actually see a position that had clearly changed from its diametric opposite in the space of one meeting.

As a rule, I try not to imagine that God has inspired something, I try to discern how he might have approached an issue and what he might have done and then act accordingly. But things are just happening at what I could consider break-neck speed, given that upto now, things seemed to be moving at a pace that while I have never been in any rush to tread the path of Ordained Ministry, seemed to be mostly about waiting on God, while the church did its job of discernment and decision making. The church, being the good old CofE was never going to be speedy, perhaps over cautious might be a reasonable description. Slow, might be another.

In the past few weeks, I have detected a certain increase in pace. A new momentum, which initially I put down to the church getting its act together, but now I seem to feel is something actually empowering the momentum. I attribute this to the power of the Spirit, exercising God's will actively in my life.

I've always been quite a visual person, examples being my experience of sensing that cold breath in a church rising above the congregation as they pray as being our prayers rising to heaven. Other things I've experienced over the past year or so reinforce the visual experience as being a valid perception and being intrinsic to how I experience my faith and personal relationship with God.

It appears to me now that many things that I am experiencing are active interventions, perhaps to help me to grow as a christian, but to me, seem to be directing my vocation experience to become wider, deeper and perhaps with a more intense focus.

Last monday was the DDO meeting, which I blogged on just afterwards. As I left the meeting, I felt as if I was walking on air and full of joy. Grace had been poured into the meeting with the DDO, it was perceptible to both of us I think as we actually spoke about its effects.

On Tuesday I attended my Parish mid-week communion followed by a staff meeting. I seemed to be still uplifted and full of joy, and expressed this to those, who actually had seen how I was for themselves. On Wednesday, expecting to have a quiet day, I was prompted to attend Holy Communion at a local church (not my Parish_ and again, felt the exhilaration and joy of being there, worshiping and sharing with others the Joy of just 'being'.

On Thursday, I attended an Intercessions Workshop run in our Parish by our marvelous, inspiring curate, during the hour and a half of the workshop, those attending shared their experiences of researching, preparing, writing and leading intercessions. Again, having started with prayer in the vestry, we just seemed to be 'released' to speak freely and to share, perhaps more than we would have otherwise. The small group, the intimacy of the setting, in a 1000 year old church, surrounded by the prayers of generations might have been conducive to the atmosphere, but the Holy Spirit among us was perceptible to me, which I believe empowered us to be so constructive and to receptive to the learning experience we took part in.

Later that day, I was drawn to go the the Cathedral and just sit. As I was going in, I noted that a 'Pilgrim' service was to be held at 4 pm, and it just came to me, that I needed to be there. I sneaked around the barriers in the Crypt to the Jesus Chapel and finding the visiting priest with his people, asked would he mind if I joined his congregation for their Holy Communion. He readily made me welcome and I was privileged to share the experience of a group of Anglican Pilgrims, sharing the bread and wine in the ancient cathedral crypt, this service was the culmination fo their pilgrimage, they were returning home afterwards. It was a joy filled service, and I was made welcome by all of them and included in everything. This just seemed natural to them, and helped me to remember that its not my church, its not their church, its Jesus' church, his body and we are all integral part of it.

I stayed on for Choral Evensong with the Boys Choir and again, had a worship experience that is second to none that I know of. The combination of voices, the Psalms the readings and the setting really seemed to me to be heaven on earth.

After Evensong and some supper, I went to attend a Meeting at a local church where the Bishop and the Diocesan secretary where to outline the 'Moving Forward Together' agenda and the resources required for the next year. Again, the meeting started with prayer, the Bishop drawing our attention to Paul's letter to Phillipi which he found appropriate to the context of the meeting and inspiring him to speak
.
The Vision and the Objectives outlined are centered on discipleship and growth. They are both inspiring, but are, I can see, essential to allow the church to remain central to life in our communities.

One aspect which really resonated was the talk about 'Re-imagining' ministry. This is driven by the need to refocus our effort back onto community engagement, but to depart from the traditional, inherited model of ministry, which is increasingly, while working, becoming unsustainable and frankly, unaffordable. I've got loads more thinking and praying to do in this, but one model proposed is a vision of collaborative ministry, with many fewer stipendiary ministers, leading a cluster of churches, which might have self-supporting priests in charge, but with an enhanced, empowered, expanded lay ministry. Vocations are key to this and to future growth. Discipleship comes central to this as the means of empowering all laity to their baptism gift of each being a 'great high priest' in their membership of the church.

Today, I attended and participated in two services, a BCP Holy Communion and a CW Sung Eucharist where I led intercessions. Both services were uplifting worthwhile, worship experiences and I came away, refreshed and uplifted.

I had been prompted to review and amend the intercessions following the Thursday meeting, but again on Saturday evening I was prompted to edit them further. Evidence again for me of God's actions to draw the best from me. The intercessions drew praise and thanks, which is not a cause of pride, rather a cause for thanksgiving from me to the Triune God who has been and is being, so active and giving so much joy in my life.

When I read this back, and if I did not know myself, I might think how delusional is that? but sensing that God seems to have seen fit to entrust me with something, which might or might not be Ordained Ministry, is so empowering and overwhelming, that I can hardly believe that it has happened to me? But it has, and it is.

I have a sense of wonder that these gifts have been so freely given to such an undeserving case as I know I am. But, it gives me great joy to say, Hallelujah and Praise be to God for them.